How does a woman’s growth and attitude determine the quality and temperature of a relationship?
Psychologists say “there is no such thing as eternal intimacy, which is a statement that we seek psychological comfort. Instead of seeking eternal intimacy, focus on “quality” and “nourishing” intimacy. It is most important that both partners relax, enjoy, delight, and nourish their bodies and minds when they are together.
To “high quality”, “nourishing” an intimate relationship, we must have high emotional intelligence and wisdom, so that both sides can get along with the pleasure, when the problem occurs to take the initiative to resolve, not to let the love in time to die, but more each other know and love.
Specific women should do this.
1. when things do not blindly jump to conclusions, think calmly before making a decision
Marriage in two quarrels, basically women do not distinguish between black and white bickering, they are relieved to be comfortable, but the other half of the scared to hide away. As the saying goes, “there is reason not in the sound high”, the woman’s anger and yelling will only anger men, or let them avoid, the result can not solve any problems at all.
The right way should be, when things first calm down, carefully examine whether they are doing the right thing, even if the wrong in each other, do not let anger overwhelm, and so each other cool down, and then calmly talk about it. The purpose is to let each other really digest and accept your ideas, so that you both see clearly each other’s position and the problems in the body.
2. Before asking others, ask yourself first:
Some girls are particularly demanding of their significant other, yet he is always indifferent and does not do what the girl says, so she is particularly bitter, three or four times as the sky and the earth, but also can not understand why he just can not do.
In fact, the feelings are mutual. You are asking others, you have to ask yourself if you are doing a good job.
For example, you want your boyfriend to be gentle to you, then you have nothing to shout; you want each other to hold you as a princess, then you have to be understanding, know how to hush and warm, do a good job of a sage; you want each other to understand you, then you must also spend time and energy to understand each other, more to talk about communication.
If you yourself do not know, do not value the relationship, do not blame the other party, did not make an effort for the relationship.
3. do not be a slave to emotions, to do the master of emotions
Anthony Robbins, a famous American psychologist, said: “The secret of success lies in knowing how to control the force of pain and pleasure, and not for this force to counteract. If you can do this, you will be in control of your life, and if not, your life will not be in control.”
The most basic self-awareness of a mature adult is to remain emotionally stable. Some people have a habit of exposing the worst of themselves to the people they love the most, which is foolish and a failure. Especially in relationships, when you are always hurting each other because of some unpleasant emotions, so that the other person’s heart is hurt and depressed, do not know that the intimate relationship is also in the process of the cracks.
So control their own emotions, do not do the master of emotions, when two people in conflict, first to the bad emotions emergency brake, timely change of mind, a different perspective to see the problem, can put themselves in the other side to understand, I believe the problem will also be solved.
4. couples like a mirror, each other’s shadow
Couples together for a long time, there will be more and more husband and wife, in addition to looks, and the way to treat people, behavior and habits, as the saying goes “every wife or husband have no reference, there is no way to refer to how others do wife or husband, and the TA’s only reference is the pillow”.
Some women have not praised their husbands for a long time. Every day, in addition to complaining, is spitting. That can be imagined. He will also invariably follow your example, slowly dislike you, laugh at you.
A relationship with each other is the mirror of each other, how you treat him, how he treats you. You want each other enough to love you, you have to love each other enough; you want each other and cheerful, you also want to often smile at him.
5. not afraid of aging, do not refuse to self-growth
The last point is very important, do not give up self-growth, no age should not refuse to learn and cultivate, a woman’s inner abundance, will become independent, confident, so that she can not only be wise in dealing with feelings but also have a mature charm not defeated by the years, which is also known as a variety of bottom.
The bottom of the woman, never afraid of aging and losing love, because they know that I can love you very much, but also without you, they are clear. I can have you, but also able to grasp you.
6. do not take sex as a task
Both partners who will have a sexual life needs, when one party requires, the other party naturally needs to meet each other’s requirements. But at the same time, to meet, can not be done as a task, because that will not have any fun.
It is best if both partners can accept the need for sex harmoniously and enjoy the process. Make every effort to avoid situations where only one partner is acting.
With the help of some interesting sex toys during sex, you can avoid a situation where only one of you is active because you will be curious and have fun.
So, women do not need to rush to change each other, first learn to see themselves, cherish their soft power, I believe you will become each other, that better partner.